OFFICIATING WEDDINGS

​A Practical Guide to Performing a Wedding Ceremony as Clergy of Our Church

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OVERVIEW

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In a wedding, two separate processes are involved: the ceremonial celebration and the legal marriage registration. You lead the first; the state handles the second.

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Before anything else, always contact your local county or city clerk. They process marriages every day and will tell you exactly what is required in your area. Their guidance overrides everything else.

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As hallowed clergy of our church, your role is to officiate the ceremony itself. The legal marriage is handled through government paperwork, which may or may not involve you depending on local law. In all cases, there is a reliable and universal option: you may always perform the ceremony, while the couple completes the legal marriage registration with the clerk’s office.

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You may also preside over purely symbolic weddings without any legal component, when requested—ceremonies that are personal, meaningful, and non-legally binding. Many people actively seek such services. The choice of which weddings you will or will not officiate remains entirely yours. We fully support and defend that right, and we will not compromise on it under any external pressure.

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The Core Idea

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A wedding has two parts:

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• Ceremony — The emotional, symbolic, and social event you lead

• Legal marriage — The paperwork filed with the government

 

These are connected, but not always performed by the same person.

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Some locations allow clergy to sign and file paperwork. Others require the couple to handle it entirely on their own. Either way, the ceremony itself is always valid as a meaningful life event.

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Your Role as Clergy

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As hallowed clergy, your responsibility is to guide the ceremony—not to manage legal authority or paperwork systems.

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• You are there because the couple chose you and it should be considered a high honor.

• That is the most important fact in the entire process.

• You are not being tested, licensed, or judged in a formal sense.

• You are simply guiding a meaningful moment between two people (usually).

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What Every Ceremony Must Include

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At minimum, a valid wedding ceremony includes:

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1. Declaration of Intent
   Each partner confirms their commitment (commonly “Do you take this person…?” / “I do.”)

2. Pronouncement
   You formally declare the couple married

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Everything Else Is Flexible

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You can include as much or as little as the couple wants:

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• Personal vows

• Readings or poems

• Humor or storytelling

• Religious or spiritual elements

• Symbolic rituals

• Music or cultural traditions

 

There is no required format beyond the two core elements above.

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Common Concerns (And Reality)

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“What if I mess up?”

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• There is no strict script or grading system.

• If you include the Declaration of Intent and Pronouncement, you’ve done the essential work.

• Everything else is adaptable.

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“What if I get nervous?”

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• That is normal for anyone so don't worry about it.

• Most ceremonies are short, and the couple does much of the speaking.

• A steady voice is nice, but sincerity matters far more than perfection.

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“What if I forget something?”

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• Bring notes as it can help.

• Printed scripts are standard even for professional officiants as a guide.

• No one expects memorization.

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“What if something goes wrong?”

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• Something almost always goes slightly off-plan.

• It is part of weddings and its also part of the fun that makes them memorable.

• These moments rarely ruin anything and often become the most memorable parts of the day.

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Preparing for the Ceremony

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1. Confirm expectations with the couple

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Ask what kind of ceremony they want:

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• Formal or casual

• Religious or secular

• Short or extended

• Serious or lighthearted

 

This shapes everything else.

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2. Prepare your script

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Include:

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• Declaration of Intent

• Pronouncement

• Any personalized content requested by the couple

 

3. Practice aloud

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• Read it through at least twice or whatever works for you.

• This helps with pacing and confidence.

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Ceremony Day Checklist

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You Bring:

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• Printed script

• Hallowed clergy credentials (if applicable)

• A black pen

 

During the ceremony:

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• Follow your script calmly

• Guide the couple through the key moments

• Keep the focus on them

 

Structure:

Declaration of Intent → Pronouncement → Marriage is celebrated

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Understanding the Legal Side (If Involved)

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• In some places, clergy may also assist with legal paperwork.

• In others, you are strictly ceremonial.

• This depends entirely on local law and the county clerk’s requirements.

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Before the Wedding (Paperwork Guidance)

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Always contact the local clerk first.

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They will tell you:

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• Whether clergy can sign licenses

• Whether registration is required

• What forms are needed

• How and when documents must be returned

 

If registration is required, complete it early to avoid delays.

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The Couple’s Responsibility

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The couple must obtain their marriage license before the ceremony.

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This includes:

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• Applying at the clerk’s office

• Paying required fees

• Meeting any waiting period requirements

• Ensuring the license is valid on the wedding day

 

This is their responsibility, not yours.

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After the Ceremony (If You Handle Paperwork)

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If allowed in your jurisdiction: Immediately after the ceremony

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• Sign the marriage license (black ink)

• Ensure couple and witnesses sign as required

 

Afterward

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• Return the license to the issuing clerk’s office

• Follow the required deadline (varies by location)

 

This step is critical if you are part of the legal filing process.

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If You Are Only Performing the Ceremony

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If you are not involved in paperwork:

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• Perform the ceremony

• The couple completes all legal steps with the clerk

• Your role ends at the Pronouncement

 

This is completely valid and common.

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Final Perspective

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• Your role is not administrative—it is human.

• You are guiding a moment of commitment that the couple will remember for the rest of their lives.

• The legal system handles documentation.

• You handle presence, meaning, and ceremony.

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Remember:

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• Keep it simple.

• Keep it clear.

• Focus on the couple.

• And relax so you can have fun also.

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THE KEY FACTORS TO UNDERSTAND

 

People often ask about the guiding principles of marriage within the First Church of Druwayu. These questions typically involve sexual ethics, relationship structures, and what kinds of unions the Church does or does not officiate.

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This document clarifies those standards in direct terms.

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The Church of Druwayu distinguishes between ceremonial participation and civil legal marriage. We conduct religious or ceremonial weddings according to our principles, while legal marriage is governed by the laws of the relevant jurisdiction and processed through civil authorities such as county or city clerks.

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Always consult your local clerk before conducting a ceremony. They are the final authority on legal requirements.

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Core Position on Marriage

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The Church of Druwayu defines marriage as a voluntary, consensual, adult union conducted within clearly defined ethical boundaries.

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Participation in Druwayu ceremonies is limited to those who align with these principles. These standards are not adjusted in response to external pressure or preference, and alternative officiants are available for those seeking different frameworks.

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The Church does not impose its practices on others, and likewise does not accept external demands that would alter its foundational principles.

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Forms of Union We Do Not Officiate

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The Church of Druwayu does not officiate or recognize the following types of unions:

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• Any union involving individuals under the age of 18.

• Any unions between humans and objects.

• Any Same-sex marriages or same-sex union ceremonies.

• Any Incestuous relationships or marriages between close biological relatives.

• Any union where consent is not fully informed, freely given, and continuously maintained.

• Any union involving a non-human party or any being incapable of legal and informed consent.

• Any union that cannot meet the standard of mutual adult consent as defined by Church doctrine.

 

Foundational Principles of Druwayu Marriage

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All Druwayu ceremonies are grounded in three non-negotiable principles:

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• Adult participation

• Informed, voluntary, and ongoing consent

• Non-coercion

 

Within these boundaries, recognized ceremony structures may include monogamous or polygynous arrangements, provided all participants explicitly and freely agree.

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Adult Participation Standard

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Marriage within Druwayu is strictly limited to individuals 18 years of age or older. This requirement ensures legal standing and the presence of sufficient maturity to enter a binding relational commitment.

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It also functions as a safeguard against structural power imbalances that can undermine meaningful consent.

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Consent as the Basis of Legitimacy

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Consent is the central requirement of all Druwayu ceremonies.

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It must be:

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• Informed

• Freely given

• Ongoing

• Revocable

 

Marriage is not considered a permanent surrender of autonomy, but a continuing agreement that must remain valid throughout its duration.

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The number of participants does not determine validity. The presence and integrity of consent does.

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Recognized Relationship Structures

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The Church of Druwayu recognizes two general forms of consensual adult marriage structures:

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These principles are grounded in reproductive biology, population genetics, and the necessity of maintaining genetic diversity within human populations over time, alongside the practical realities of male and female reproductive limitations and the care of offspring which also is itself based on out entrancement of real sciences. 

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Within the context of marriage, we reject the concept of so-called “racial purity” on the basis that humans are a single interbreeding species. All humans are capable of reproduction with one another, and therefore do not constitute biologically separate “races” in any genetic sense.

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• Monogamy: A union between two consenting adults as in one man and one woman, typically forming a dyadic partnership with shared relational responsibility.

• Polygyny: A consensual arrangement in which one male forms marital bonds with multiple female spouses, provided that every participant independently and explicitly consents. No assumption of dominance or entitlement is inherent in this structure, and factors like wealth/finance are not points of focus.

  • Traditionally, we have inherited a rare but old custom where the initiation of such unions is not centered on the male participant's pursuit. Instead, it is often initiated or coordinated by the first wife, who may propose or introduce additional partners simultaneously, but usually no more than two others. The male, of course has a right to reject anyone else which she must also honor.

  • Alternatively, two females or more females (usually no more than three) my present themselves at the same time and is up to the male to accept both or none. All participants must be consenting adults, and standard Druwayu restrictions apply, including the prohibition on incorporating siblings or immediate family members, consistent with the incest restriction.

  • Generally speaking, polygyny is usually only initiated when there is a significant drop in population or reproduction of offspring as necessary population replacement, especially where reproductive and birth rates have plummeted and indicate a potential extinction level event. So again, science, as well as specific commitments, are part of this inclusion. 

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In all cases, the ethical standard remains identical: consent, clarity, and non-coercion.

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Incest Prohibition

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The Church of Druwayu explicitly prohibits incestuous unions. This restriction exists due to concerns regarding consent integrity, dependency-based power dynamics, and the difficulty of establishing fully independent relational autonomy within close biological family structures.

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Marriage as a Human Institution

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Marriage is understood as a deliberate human construct rather than an inherently sacred or purely legal status.

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Its validity is evaluated based on:

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• Ethical clarity

• Mutual benefit

• Ongoing consent

• Absence of coercion

 

Marriage is not treated as immutable once established.

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Relationship to Civil Law

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The Church of Druwayu recognizes and respects the civil laws of the jurisdiction in which a ceremony takes place.

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Where certain relationship structures are not legally recognized, Druwayu ceremonies may function as non-legal religious or relational commitments rather than civil marriages.

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The Church does not encourage or require violation of applicable laws.

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Druwayu marriage is defined by structure, consent, and ethical clarity rather than ritual alone.

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All valid ceremonies must meet the following conditions:

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• All participants are consenting adults

• Consent is informed, voluntary, and ongoing

• No coercion is present

• No prohibited relationship structures are involved

 

Within these boundaries, Druwayu recognizes monogamous and polygynous unions as valid forms based within actual factors of biology rather than "humanist" idiologies.

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The Church’s role is to serve those who freely choose participation under these principles—not to adapt its standards to external demand, nor to impose its standards on those outside its practice.

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